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Quotes of the Day
Posted: Tue Jun 29, 2004 9:03 pm
by Doughboy
Alright. I'm pretty sure we all hear some strange stuff throughout the day at work or otherwise. Let's hear the best (worst) of it.
Friday during Manager's Meeting at work:
(store manager) Would you close your legs!!!
Friday night at home:
Are the homies still upstairs? I want to molest the homies!!
Posted: Wed Jun 30, 2004 5:43 am
by Louis Zerr
Some of you know the type of work i do is mostly with police departments and other entities that require fingerprinting for employment or booking purpposes.
(Customer)Yes, we require a replacement part because a suspect has released his bodily fluids onto our card printer.
(Chief of police rep)Our fingeprint technicians are the lowest demoninator of people; they would be fired or have been fired from McDonalds.
Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2004 3:16 pm
by Doughboy
Heard in the background while on the phone with fellow manager from the Maple Grove Ultimate:
"Hey, yours is poking out a little"
Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2004 7:50 pm
by umdivx
One the phone with a customer today who had a really bad case of spyware
Customer:
" Ok I just deleted my Internet Explorer folder from my program files folder to get rid of the spyware and Internet Explorer, so now how to I reinstall Internet Explorer"
Me:
Under my breath "Ok great u fucking moron" "ummm... well sir you just killed your computer, you'll have to buy a new one, have a good day"
Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2004 12:03 pm
by Doughboy
Again, at work:
"One of my retards used to do that."
Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2004 1:36 pm
by trahma
Rod the other day talking about his turbo setup...
"I feel like the fat kid going to mcd's and finding out it is closed"
Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2004 5:25 pm
by Louis Zerr
My employee the other day, "Damn i took a shower but my ass still itches."
Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2004 11:40 am
by Louis Zerr
One of my employess seconds ago:
"I pee on the livescan"
Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2004 12:23 pm
by umdivx
me: "ok now, got to your start button, and then go to programs, and then cisco vpn client"
the advisor on the phone: "ok I pushed the start button but then my computer shut off"
after a while back and forth I got the advisor to admit she pushed her power button on her tower, she admited to not ever using a computer before.
Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2004 6:18 am
by Doughboy
Last night talking to a female friend on the phone:
"Well I'm NOT shaving my legs for my husband."
Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2004 1:18 pm
by Kaotik Kreation
not really a quote but kinda funny at the time
went to a house on a search warrant, we were looking for a male suspect, we go to the door and a female answers, we ask for (male suspect) female says he is not home, we provide the warrant papers. as we go through the house a female exits the bathroom, we ask what her name is, she answers (deep male voice) come to find out the male suspect we were looking for is a cross dresser!!!!!
like i said it was funny at the time
Posted: Sun Jul 11, 2004 12:02 pm
by Doughboy
All said by a female friend last night:
"I'd like to show you my new move, but I can't with my pants on"
"STOP! You're getting me all wet"
"Quit playing with me!"
Which all sounds great and good when taken out of context, but that's it.
The pants comment was in regards to showing me a new martial arts kick that wouldn't work so well with skin tight pants- the 'wet' comment was because I had just washed my hands- and I can't remember exactly when the 'quit playing' comment came up.
Posted: Mon Jul 12, 2004 10:21 am
by Louis Zerr
Just heard!!
Diane-"Oh my god it's so long!"
She was talking to my employee Rodney, about his spider plant.
Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2004 7:17 am
by spooty2y
How about this one...
"Sharon Peters must be related to Sandy Cox"
Posted: Sun Aug 08, 2004 8:28 pm
by Doughboy
"I had a dream that you planted a garden on a trampoline, and I was soooooo happy that I invented peanut butter."
From the movie "All the Real Girls"